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Harper says he's not in peak shape yet. He plans to bump and grind away the chub.
Sports

Dump the holiday heft

By Thien Huynh

That’s not the aroma of fried bacon all over Ryerson. The smell is actually coming from university students and athletes trying to burn away fat and calories consumed over the holidays.

Athletes are usually first to notice the affects of the holiday tubbiness when panting increases during their practice and workout regimes. Unfortunately, Ryerson doesn’t have a sumo wrestling team for athletes to join, so instead they have to exercise profusely and suffer while they try to get back into peak physical form.

Forward Carl Harper of the men’s basketball team is respected for his overpowering stature. But the holidays have put some pounds on his six-foot-five frame. Harper figures working extra hard in practice will get him back to his  former glorious form. If that doesn’t work, he has a back-up plan. “I’ll just party it away, bumpin’ and grindin’ on the dance floor.” No word yet if he prefers Voguing or the Macarena.

Women’s basketball coach Sandy Poither expects big things from her team this year but first she has to get them back into shape. Poither plans to increase the running drills and wind sprints in practice. This intensity should shake-off the sluggishness. She doesn’t want the Rams to turn into cows.

But what of the normal Ryerson student? Do they even realize that they’ve gained some holiday chub? A good indicator is to go in front of a mirror, pull down your pants and get a friend to slap your ass. If your butt jiggles for more than three seconds it’s time to start cutting down on those new Burger King fries.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with some new found chunk. The added lipids can be used as insulation against the harsh winter weather. However, some students just aren’t all that concerned about the added weight. “I’ll just sit on it and the fat will just leave. In time it will go away,” says Viveen Wright, a business management student.

There are a variety of options for students who wish to get back to their original weight. The RAC offers aerobics, weight-training , and nutritional guidance to coincide with the post-holiday weight-loss spree.

Some students resort to unconventional ways to lose weight. Computer science student Janice Chan hopes to meditate her fat away through yoga.

CORRECTION: A previous version of this story included a comment from a student that has since been removed. 

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