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Cramming, caffeine and masturbation: March 22, 1995

By Mike Onesi

Rick Townson looks like a typical student pulling an all-nighter. He has a CD player blasting music, a TV in case he wants to watch any infomercials at 3 a.m., and a microwave and sandwich maker for late-night munchies.

But what’s unique about this scene is Townson is not at home, but on the second floor of the Architecture building.

Townson works in what he calls “The Abberation,” a make-shift shack, that was thrown together by six first year architecture students.

With only five weeks of school left, Townson is like most Ryerson students, scrambling to complete his assignments while cramming for tests.

“It’s not all-nighters, it’s more like all-weekers (for us),” said Mike Walker, a fellow resident of the Abberation.

This group of architecture students could be the Ryerson all-nighter poster boys.

“We’ve got a system,” Walker said, noting that setting up a second home at school is not the only way to survive an all-nighter.

The key is lots of “therapy”: not psychology, but the group’s super energy elixir. The drink consists of lots of ice tea and tons of sugar. It’s brewed in advance for long nights of school work.

And to break the monotony of late-night studying, the students will play Pigball in the front lobby. Pigbal closely resembles soccer, except that a stuffed pink pig is used for a ball.

But what drives Len Rudomski crazy is not the amount of work, it’s the professors who walk by, smiling the night before an assignment is due.

“I’d like to bite his throat,” said the member of the first year architecture gang.

One too many all-nighters must be screwing with Townson’s mind, because he says he enjoys the constant flood of work.

“I wouldn’t change it for the world. We get all fidgety, but deep down I love it.”

Rhonda Goslinski is a student who doesn’t share Townson’s love for academic overload.

“I’m burnt out,” said the first year chemical engineering student. While studying for a calculus test last month, Goslinski went nuts. “At 1 a.m., I came out of my room after several hours of studying and I began freaking out on my roommate (screaming) ‘I don’t know anything! I don’t know anything.’ I was having a panic attack.” Goslinski was correct about not knowing anything: she ended up failing the test.

This week Rhonda has three tests and four labs to hand in.

So for all you students out there who are whining about the crush of school work, quit your complaining because there are a billion other students out there in your shoes.

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