By Abbey Kelly This is a combination piece from our Fun Issue, The Darkest Timeline. Life has become such a clusterfuck that it’s hard to tell the difference between reality and satire. …
Ryerson counselling wait times are still several months long
When it comes to mental health services, wait times can have severe consequences
Child care cuts in Ontario are hurting students with kids
Child care was already a faulty system, but now provincial cuts are making students choose between classes or their kids
God abandons humanity to loiter on campus
The original Creator and Supreme Ruler of the Universe came down in the form of a Gould Street skater
Students just fucking hope we’re in a simulation
The simulation will be televised…
Doug Ford worried journalists will find his tax refund, cancels journalism entirely
“A spray-tanned goblin like Ford is the perfect candidate to join a secret tax evasion society”
RSU becomes victim of cancel culture through student choice initiative
The RSU loves student money, who knew?
Good vibes despite planetary existential crisis
We’ve comprised a list of totally valid and 100 per cent effective ways to turn that anxiety-induced resting bitch-frown upside down.