Toronto Metropolitan University's Independent Student Newspaper Since 1967

All Arts & Culture Entertainment

Film festering and loathing in Toronto

By Fraser Robinson

Editor’s Note:

Ten days of films in Toronto. 51 films during those ten days. What to do? Simple. Divide up the films among a pool of savvy reviewers, right? Wrong. Why should you, when one reviewer, lonely for the intimacy of warm, sweaty handshakes endemic to movie schmooze-fests, will do? Indeed. Why?

Mr. Fraser Robinson was such a lone reviewer with just the fetish for prespiratory grips. He will do. And he did. Behold and be in awe.

To Die For: Satirical dark comedy which pokes fun at society’s (possibly dangerous) obsessions with the media.

Doom Generation: The poster says, “Eat, Fuck, Kill” – and that says it all.

Le Confessional: Well made debut by theater director Robert Lepage and one of the most “Canadian” films to be seen.

Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead: Waste of talent, money and celluloid. However, this may be the beginning of a Treat Williams comeback. 

Angel Baby: Moving film from Australia about the mentally ill.

Unstrung Heroes: Great debut by Diane Keaton – watch Michael Richards escape the shadow of the tired Kramer schtick.

Loaded: Annoying know-it-all teens who do acid and then they know even more. 

War Stories: New Zealand women during World War II – surprisingly good. 

Madagascar Skin: A guy with a birthmark shaped like Madagascar moves to the seaside and meets a bricklayer. You won’t believe it, but it’s a must-see. 

Screamers: Aliens will never happen again. Let it die.

Art For Teachers of Children: Introspection filmmaking at its best. The true story of lust and posing nude at 14.

The Michelle Apartments: Avoid.

The Run of the Country: One man’s terrible summer in the hills of Ireland.

The Grotesque: Freaked out dark comedy with Sting at his best. 

Escape: Confusion political thriller from the Phillipines which fails to thrill.

Tokyo Fist: Boxing, piercing, gore and skewed romance in Tokyo.

If Only I Were An Indian: A bizarre group of Indian “imitators” in the Czech Republic. Strange topic, but well presented.

Young Poisoners Handbook: You’re fourteen and you poison people that you don’t like.

Mute Witness: If you can ignore the poor acting and writing this is the most intense thrill you’ll have this year.

Go Now: Slow moving British film about dealing with MS.

Liste Noir: Ho-Hum political scandal film from Quebec.

Korea: Drama about holding grudges in Ireland.

In the Bleak Midwinter: Six actors attempting Hamlet in a condemned church. Hilarity ensues.

Adultery: A Users Guide: Silly french drama.

Trailer Park: A collection of previews from your favourite raunchy cult classics.

Mighty Aphrodite: Woody Allen scores again.

Mrs. Munck: Painfully idiotic film from the untalented mind of Diane Ladd.

Wizard of Darkness: Japanese teens fight Satan. Gore galore.

I.D.: Football thugs in Britain and the cops that chase them.

Reckless: Bizarre comedy/drama with Mia Farrow.

Vintage: Families of Value: Black families dealing with homosexuality.

Pasolini – An Italian Crime: What JFK should have been.

Evil Town: Charles Bukowski story about castration.

Keeper: Prison movie about struggling to accept your roots.

Man of the Year: A year in the life of a Playgirl model with a big secret.

Nothing Personal: Terrific drama about the human side of the conflict in Ireland. 

Georgia: Sibling rivalry in the music industry.

Once Upon A Time… This Morning: Three kids try to find their father and are chased by drug dealers.

Under A Blue Moon: Surprisingly enjoyable “family” movie.

Crying Freeman: Hot action, confusing plot, bad acting. 

Sleepover: Yet another kids-get-together-and-chat-insightfully-about-life film.

Cry, the Beloved Country: Crime and punishment in South Africa in 1946.

Nobody Loves Me: A German airport security guard and her gay voodoo friend look for love.

A Hard Day’s Night: The Beatles at their foppish best.

Devil in a Blue Dress: Mediocre Raymond Chandler-esque detective movie.

Day of the Beast: Spanish Ghostbusters on crack. 

Blue in the Face: Lots of conversations about lots of different things.

Denise Calls Up: Social comment about people who only know each other on the phone.

Flirt: A love story told three times over. Surprisingly watchable.

Four Rooms: Four mediocre to poor short films about one crazy night in a hotel.

Gamera: Guardian of the Universe: Japanese monster movie about a giant flying turtle fighting giant killing birds.

Leave a Reply