MERRY SEX-MAS

In Arts & Life /

By Josh Bailie

If you can’t find the right holiday gift to touch your loved one’s heart, maybe you’re trying to touch the wrong part of the body.

If that’s the case, check out Ryerson’s local Stag Shop.

The store boasts “naughty or nice” gifts for couples and a variety of novelty items to make your friends laugh.

“Christmas is definitely one of our busiest times of the year,” said Marie Dawn Leung, manager of the Yonge Street location.

Leung predicts the store will be decked out in Christmas gear by the first week of December.

The store’s website is also getting prepared for the holiday influx. It has a countdown to Christmas and links to dozens of gift ideas. Everything you could possibly want for that special someone can easily be ordered online.

For guys, the website suggests gifts like microfiber boxer briefs and blowjob vouchers. The briefs can add a little extra definition without cutting off circulation, while the vouchers are a great secret Santa gift.

For ladies, the most notable suggestion is the 2008 Sex Toy of the Year, the We-Vibe: a vibrator that’s compact, hands-free and two-speed.

For a festive sartorial treat, there’s a Mrs. Claus outfit specifically designed to make Santa’s pole go North.

The ensemble offers a halter top, booty shorts, removable sleeves and a white-feathered headpiece. Each garment is red with white-feathered trimming, but an all-white Snow Princess is also available.

Meanwhile, St. Nick can keep things simple with a holiday thong that covers his ‘mistletoe’ with a Santa hat.

Leung prefers to categorize gifts as naughty and nice. She said the most popular naughty gifts are products like handcuffs, whips and chains, and the nice gifts are ones like massage oils, rose petals, feathers and lace.

“We’re the romantic side of the holidays,” Leung said, adding that they offer romance kits that combine the nicer products together.

She also pointed out that a gift card is a great idea if you really don’t know what to get your partner.

“For that special someone it can be really hard to tell. Then the couple can come in and shop together.”

Holiday items aren’t the only attractive items. There are old stand-bys like edible g-strings, X-rated laser pointers and well-endowed stuffed animals known as “Wild Willies.”

Next week, you should be able to find the staff decorating the store.

Leung remembers erecting the tree last year, covering it with mini-dildos, candied breasts, erotic dice and anal beads. She serenaded all the while with her own rendition of “O Christmas Tree,” aptly titled “O Dildo Tree.”

“I’ll probably do the same thing this year,” she laughed.

Leung and her staff can be found at 239 Yonge St., across from the Eaton Centre.

To help keep your holidays sexy, the shop offers students 10 per cent off almost all purchases.

Leave a Comment