Stay off the streets

In Fun & SatireLeave a Comment

Reading Time: 2 minutes

By Tasha Zanin

For many students life in residence means one year of no parents and no rules. But don’t get too excited. Here are a few guidelines to keep in mind to avoid being kicked out onto the streets in the middle of the year.

Nine points and you’re out

Student Housing Services uses a point system to keep the rowdy first-years under control, outlined in the contract students sign upon acceptance. After the first three points, you’ll take a Residence Community Standards quiz. And if you want to keep signing your friends in, stay under six points, which is probation level. The highest level, nine points, will earn you an eviction notice.

Sometimes you have to shut up

Those loud parties you’ve been looking forward to all summer could earn you anywhere between one and three points for excessive noise and out of control partying. And when the Residence Advisors come knocking after quiet hours (11 p.m. on weekdays and 1 a.m. on weekends) ignoring it is a two-point offence.

Don’t get caught

Alcohol in the hallways is a one-point offence, so keep it in a bag. You’ll get three points for keeping a keg or Texas mickey, because excessive drinking is prohibited. Drinking games like beer pong and flip cup are out too; keep them hidden in your rooms and you can have your fun.

Take it outside

Smoking cigarettes or any illegal drug is also prohibited in residence. Getting caught will cost you another three points. What are you doing with that couch? Though you will want to spruce up your room and common areas, stealing couches from another floor is a onepoint offence. So is sleeping in common areas; that is what your rooms are for. Pornography is also best kept to your room, or three points will be issued.

Get creative

Themed parties are great but keep in mind that there are limitations. For example the restriction on water beds, small children’s pools, and hot tubs in residence will not only get you another two points but also sink your dreams of that wet n’ wild floor party. If you really want to have a good time, you can light your birthday candles. Just be sure they are monitored at all times, because no one appreciates a late night fire alarm in the middle of the winter.

Leave a Comment