No idea what the fuck you’re doing after graduation? There’s a group for that

By Lyba Mansoor

Ryerson announced early Friday morning that the school will start holding a weekly support group for fourth-year students who keep getting asked what their post-graduation plans are.

The support group was created after thousands of fourth-year students had very alarming, very public, meltdowns on campus.

Third-year English student Ryan Lee was a primary witness.

“I was in the SLC and overheard these two guys talking. One of them asked his friend ‘Yo, what are you saying after grad?’ and the other guy just lost it,” said Lee.

The man, who has now been identified as a fourth-year professional communication student Umer Faris, began screaming erratically, according to Lee.

“He grabbed his buddy by the shirt and started yelling ‘I don’t know, I just don’t fucking know,’” Lee said.

The Eye caught up with Faris’ friend, who told us he was just as shocked as onlookers. “I was just making small talk. I didn’t know it was such a sensitive topic,” he said.

“He was the third one to ask me that question that day. My parents, my extended family, my siblings,  my friends—they just keep asking. I can’t take it anymore. I could barely choose electives these past four years and now I have to decide what to do with the rest of my life,” said Faris.

This incident was, unfortunately, not isolated. Three days after Faris’ breakdown, another fourth-year student, Angela Terre, was seen scaling the SLC.

“We were talking about our post-grad plans. When we asked her, she just bolted,” one of her friends said.

“Suffice to say, I’d rather free-climb that building than answer that fucking question,” said Terre.

Despite four years of university education, it seems fourth-year students haven’t a clue what the hell they’re doing.

Ryerson hopes the support group will offer a safe, healthy space for students to scream for as long as they need to and comfort one another about life after graduation.

A support group staff, who asked to remain anonymous in case of a student-led revolution against the promises Ryerson consistently fails to keep, offered insight into the group. “We’re not saying that there’s any real answer to this question. We hope misery in numbers will help the kids out.”