By Cindy Lou-Who

Disclaimer:​​ He’s a mean one, Mr. Grinch. This majority of what is told about him is fake and bullshit though the story it’s based on may just have truths within it.

The Eyeopener has learned that Toronto Metropolitan University (TMU) has been leasing space to anti-holiday activist ‘the Grinch’ for several years.

According to information available on the Grinch’s website, greenwithanger.org, Mount Crumpet—a TMU-owned property just north of campus—is currently home to his lair for “wickedness, coal-hoarding and fastening reindeer antlers on dogs.”

The Eye reached out to the Grinch for comment. He was thrilled to express his support for TMU’s administration in an interview.

“TMU has been so very welcoming to me and my nefarious operation,” said the Grinch. “In fact, I’d go so far as to say the university is one of the biggest supporters of my agenda—why else would they lease to me?”

TMU spokesperson Bah Humbug said the Grinch was already a resident of Mount Crumpet when the university purchased it a decade ago.

“We were not aware the Grinch was residing there at the time. The seller said it came without ribbons, it came without tags, it came without packages, boxes or previous tenants harbouring controversial political views,” said Humbug.

Second-year politics and governance student, Neil Iberal, has no gripe with the leasing.

“I think it’s about time that we had some diversity of thought on this campus,” he said, sipping a $16 matcha. “Like, who are you to say holiday cheer isn’t all noise, noise, NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! like Mr. Grinch says.”

The Grinch’s presence hasn’t gone unnoticed. Students have reported the anti-festive beast stealing various holiday trappings across campus.

“That green fuck took my stocking,” said first-year professional music student Chilly Holiday. “And—get this—he was wearing it. They’re literally not even made for that. I don’t even want it back now.”

Another student said he spotted the Grinch stealing the bulb from that one streetlight on Gould Street that flickers. 

“He said he was taking it back to the North Pole to fix it,” said the student. “I wasn’t mad about that though, that light is annoying as fuck.”

In an email to The Eye, president Lohamed Machemi said he was blindsided by what the new property would mean for the university and overlooked the
Grinch’s presence.

“They told me campus would grow three sizes that day,” wrote Machemi. “I was almost as happy as when I found out we were closing the Imperial Pub forever.”

“Either way, students shouldn’t see this as an endorsement of the Grinch,” added the president. We rent to all kinds of tenants: Krampus, Ebeneezer Scrooge—who also serves on the Board of Governors, and the Wet Bandits from Home Alone.”