By Zachariah Fitzgerald

Disclaimer: If it sounds unbelievable it’s because it is. No student would ever dare to view a grade during the sacred protection of reading week.

With the possibility of the disrespectful release of grades during reading week, most students set their phones to do not disturb and ignore any trace of an email from D2L Brightspace. 

However, this reading week, one daring student made the unwise choice of peeking at a grade.

First-year computer engineering student Alicia Keys went into reading week with an essay rudely due at 11:59 p.m. the Friday before, which she submitted at 11:59 p.m. the Friday before reading week. 

“It was the kind of assignment you leave to the very last minute because you think you can do it in an hour but once you get started you realize why you’ve had a month to do it,” said Keys. 

“But I figured once it was submitted I could enjoy my reading week and not worry about it until I was back.” 

However, this belief was almost immediately proven wrong when Keys was notified on the Tuesday of reading week through an emailed grade notification from D2L declaring her grade for the assignment had already been posted. 

“I got the notification and I almost fell off the bed I had been rotting in for several days straight. At that point, I had gotten bored of Netflix, Instagram Reels, TikToks, Google Giggles and video essays on Elizabeth Holmes that I thought ‘what the hell?’ and clicked on it,” said Keys. 

Following the click, Keys discovered that the only thing she would find was her week being ruined and her “mode” being switched from chill to school. 

“I can’t binge eight-episode limited series’ on Hulu and AppleTV+ anymore without feeling guilty. My mode has completely shifted,” said Keys. 

Keys’ professor, Dr. Arthur Fishel, said he believed the assignment due date and the grade release date were both more than fair.

“The only unfair thing in this situation is that I have to read 200 essays that were probably written with AI,” said Fishel. “Also, I control my page on Rate My Professor so I can do anything to my students with no consequences.”