Strange Days stinky
By Kathy Blessin
These days, it’s really hard to find one movie that symbolizes everything you’ve ever wanted in a CHEEZY flick. Thankfully, Hollywood has done the deed with its newly released piece of crap Strange Days.
The plot you ask? It’s the final days of 1999 in L.A. and Lenny (Ralph Fiennes), a cop-turned-memory pusher, sells segments of peoples lives from his briefcase. A device called “Playback” allows people to record their memories, emotions and actions onto a CD, then playback and relive those memories over and over. Lenny’s the “Santa of the Subconscious,” selling these fantasies like crack.
So he comes into contact with a playback showing a man violently raping and killing a prositute who, of course, is one of Lenny’s friends. Much chasing, or CHEEZING, and beating up ensues.
The rest, like there’s more to the movie, is too stupid to get into — but there’s lot of killing, butchy women, nudity, violent sex, bad acting and a horribly CHEEZY ending (i.e. hero gets girl and kisses in the middle of a full-blown riot…shee-yeah!).
Fiennes, of Schindler’s List and Quiz Show, almost gets away with uttering the CHEEZIEST lines ever given to an actor, much to his credit. Angela Bassett, who plays one of Lenny’s romantic interests, takes an unbelievable step with her character Mace (the name says it all), going from waitress to Grace Jones-esque butch woman. Juliette Lewis comes off as a pure skank, but perfects the art of pouting. The rest of the cast personifies the term “two-bit actor.”
As a friend that was with me put it, “I didn’t even pay to get into the flick and I feel ripped off.” ‘Nuff said, except for one thing. If you choose to see this film, be careful — it’s so bad that it almost causes brawls to break out in the theater itself.
Don’t even ask…