Pleasures of penatration

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By Leigh Felesky

If you think fulfilling your sex drive requires a condom, a partner and a phone call the next day, think again. Pleasure is attainable without such complications. Sex toys have no needs, no feelings, no HIV. They’re perfect for women tired of relying on partners. Here’s a guide to help you purchase the right toy, from the right store.

For $30 you can have the stick you’ve always wanted. But to choose a screamer, you have to know what you like.

Big, small, fat, skinny, bumpy, smooth, black, beige, blue, pink — the dildo section alone is stimulating. Dildos come in sizes varying from 5 to 12 inches long. Some are jelly rubber with a handle at the base and others are stick-like wands for a harder, more hands-on approach. Try those with an addition strategically placed to stimulate your pleasure dome. Or if you’re a front door, back door type of girl, double your fun with a two-pronged toy.

An effective and enjoyable way to choose the best size is to peel a zucchini or cucumber until you achieve the perfect fit, then take those measurements to the store.

Before throwing that carefully sculpted vegetable in the trash, don’t forget nature offers some of the best stimulants, but put it in the microwave to avoid the chills.

Once you know the size, you’re ready to go shopping. Remember most dildos are made of latex and can cause allergic reactions. If you have a latex allergy, be prepared to spend $90 on a Vertex or Scorpio dildo.

These are hand-crafted out of silicon, are flexible and don’t smell like rubber or cause irritation.

If you like clitoral stimulation, enhance your ograsm with a vibrator. They usually require two AA batteries and can be set to different speeds. For a harder approach there are metal ones or, for a more life-life experience, go for soft, flexible rubber.

Vibrators range in price from $8 to $175. Top-of-the-line is the Dragon Lady by Doc Johnson ($130). Princess, a sales clerk at the Adult Video Store, says the Dragon Lady is her top seller. “It will drive you crazy. They are better than any man. Only a machine can provide such pleasure.” Don’t worry — there are also strap-on butterfly vibrators that you can wear discreetly under your clothes. For convenience, those come with a remote control.

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