Mikey’s head up his ass

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By Shane Dingman

Party leaders at every level of government must go on “asshole training weekends” before making a media appearance.

Listening to Ontario Premier Mike Harris last week, I wish I was crazy enough to believe there is an asshole gene that forces people to participate in corporatist political movements.

You see, if I was insane enough to believe that, then I might give credence to “pay your own way” malarky that Harris spouts.

Last week Mike the Knife vomited his nonchalant contempt for students over the air on CFRB 1010. He lambasted the Canadian Federation of Students’ demand for free tuition and went on to say they also wants “free bread and free housing and free boats.”

I don’t think the CFS’s rage exists because they’ve been denied their free baguette and Collingwood cottage with jet-ski thrown in.

Mikey also said “tuition isn’t a big part of the cost of education,” because, after all, it only ends up costing around $12,000 after after four years, where student groups say some people graduate up to $50,000 in debt.

Surprise, surprise, Mikey’s not thinking about the other costs of student life.

Under what voodoo logic must you live to believe the incredibly high cost of books, course materials, food, clothing and living expenses justifies raising tuition>

What’s the lesson here?

Life is expensive and it sucks, so we’re going to make it harder to get an education. This way you’ll never escape that crappy life or improve the lot of others.

OK, it’s dopey to think tuition will ever be free — most students who don’t carry a CFS card next to their hearts realize this.

That doesn’t mean Mike Harris should act on the stunningly dense assumption that students can pay their own way with higher tuition, increasing youth unemployment, abolished rent control and the rising cost of coffee.

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