A super disappointment for Rams

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I still find it hard to believe we lost Superbowl XXXVI

A sports column by Ronnie Sykes

Did you see the Superbowl this past Sunday? I don’t generally watch major league sports, but when I heard our beloved Rams were in the game, I had to watch.

I wasn’t aware that we had a football team, but I am a devoted follower of all Rams teams. I was amazed to see that even Las Vegas was interested in a Ryerson team, and favoured our blue and gold by 14 points!

I began to ponder how the Rams managed to finagle their collective way into the big game. I figured if they had won the Vanier Cup and then beaten the best team in the CFL, they must have been awarded a seed in the NFL playoffs.

The game was played in New Orleans, against the New England Patriots. How novel! We had not one, but two members of the Commonwealth in the biggest American sporting event of the calendar year! It’s only too bad they were playing on French soil.

After a Glitter-ing rendition of the Star Spangled banner by uber-talented songstress Mariah Carey, the Rams took to the field.

The Rams were led by Kurt Warner, a first-year arts student, apparently in his third year at Ryerson.

It’s been a rough year for Rams teams. The volleyball team finished 0-15. The soccer teams (the only football teams I thought we had) both missed the playoffs. Although the women’s team won their first game in history, or something like that.

But finally, a bona fide superstar. There wasn’t a person in the world betting against Ryerson.

I positioned my Eggy dolls and my banners from the school’s only previous success — the basketball team’s run to an upset over Laurentian University — over the television.

At the last minute, I tried to get tickets to the big game, but Ticketmaster informed me they were sold out. I nearly had a five-alarm heart attack when I heard a Rams game would be impossible to attend. I was, at the very least, comforted that there would be a fair number of Rams’ fans in attendance.

Of course, when the game started, I was dismayed to hear over the Fox Broadcasting microphones that the crowd was highly partisan toward the Patriots.

The crowd spurred New England to a 14-3 lead. I was impressed that the Rams even got on the board against an NFL team, but the announcers seemed shocked that Ryerson hadn’t scored more.

At halftime, U2 came out and rocked New Orleans like it was Mardi Gras. I couldn’t figure out why Bono was wearing a coat lined with the American flag. Isn’t he Australian?

I spent more of halftime looking at Playboy Playmates on NBC’s Fear Factor.

In the second half, the Rams came back in a big way, scoring 14 points to tie the game at 17. A funny little voice in the back of my head whispered some nonsense about all the Rams teams at the school who come back from large deficits, but run out of steam right at the end.

But these football Rams looked determined. I was so convinced that they would come back that I promised God if they didn’t, I would wear a Patriots jersey for a week!

To my dismay, I lost the bet with God and the Rams lost the game. I’ve got to admit, it’s been a few days since the game, and I’m still in a funk.

I’ve been walking around the house without pants. I haven’t showered or brushed my teeth since the winning field goal crossed the goal line. I keep telling God I’ll buy the New England jersey one of these days, but I can’t persuade myself to leave the house.

When I finally revisit the campus for my one-hour elective class on Friday at 9 a.m., I’ll be looking for our football heroes. I’ll ask them about the big game. I don’t know whether I’ll fall to my knees and beg them for answers, or just sob quietly and stare.

I do this at the end of every one of the team’s seasons. It’d be even tougher if the men’s volleyball team missed the playoffs as a result of their weekend losses, but they were out of the picture in December.

Ronnie Sykes is a third-year early childhood education student. He is also the Rams’ biggest fan.

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