Leafs suck, now that’s entertainment

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By Dave McCormick

So the leafs suck again this season. Well, maybe not suck – they have won three games in a row – but they’re mediocre at best. This despite some off-season moves including several new players and a new management team. For 30 seasons now the Leafs have been brutal, give or take a couple good years. And it seems the men who run the team don’t have much interest in making the Leafs any better.

These frustrations have most Leafs fans pissed off. After an absolutely horrid season last year, the Leafs went out and spent their money on two Kings, Derek and Kris. Not exactly the saviors most fans had in mind. The team got a new president this year, who promptly offered the Leafs’ best defenseman for a general manager. These less than ingenious moves could make any Leafs fan pull their hair out.

But instead of getting frustrated, Leafs fans should take a step back and see the glass half full instead of half empty. They should ask themselves what life would be like if the Leafs were good? Well, it would be pretty boring. What kind of a conversation could you have with a fellow Leafs fan if the team was successful?

“See the Leafs last night?” “Yeah, they won 5-0, they were awesome. That’s six wins in a row.” “Yeah, they played well defensively.” “Yeah, the lines really clicked.” “Yeah, and those free agents the general manager brought in are doing a really good job.” “Yeah, what a great team.” “Yeah.”

Does this sound exciting? Not really. Think of the conversations you have with your fellow Leafs fans now.

“See the Leafs last night?” “Yeah, what a brutal game. They suck huge.” “What the hell were they doing on defence?” “Damned if I know. And those free agents they signed played with their heads up their asses.” “Yeah, you’d think with all the money the Leafs make, they’d spend some of it on some real talent.” “Yeah, that cheap bastard Stavro. Let’s go kick his ass.”

Which conversation would you rather take part in? If you picked conversation number one, I suggest you move to Colorado.

A lot of Leafs fans cringe at the word “rebuilding”. That’s what the leafs are supposed to be doing now, meaning another three to five years of stinking up the joint. It sounds depressing but remember, optimism is the key here. What it really means is another three to five years of good hearty laughing and loud profanity-filled conversations with fellow Leafs fans. It means another three to five years of watching the Leafs’ management and players screwing up.

Now that’s entertainment.

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