Legend of camel toe

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By Lane Wade

The Speedo, tighty-whities, all those years of spandex and now the J. Lo juicy jumpsuits. Such fashion trends share one shocking similarity, one that crawls, creeps and rides its way up the leg to create a sinking central cavity at the frontal apex of the thighs.

In men, it forms a taut and bulging crotch, with two spheres visibly divided and suspended by a thin little inseam, crying out for help. In women, the sight can be equally outrageous, as lips bulge on both sides to form a constricted clawed-apart crevasse, assaulting the very fabric that was worn to conceal it.

This is camel toe.

While many see it as an unappealing and socially stigmatized symptom of too-tight pants, we should also consider that camel toe has been held up as one of the more sexier symbols of male and female availability. It is a sexual signal that can be neither ignored not forgotten. Either way, camel toe has entered the common vernacular and has been enshrined in popular songs like Fanny Pack’s single by the same name which asks: “Is your crotch hungry girl cuz it’s eating your pants.”

The term ‘camel toe,’ was supposedly coined in the 12th century by a man who traveled across the desert and noticed the striking similarities between his desert beast’s divided hoof and the crease created by the labia or testicles pressing against overly constrictive clothing. But has this tactless trend transversed the great divide to expose itself on Ryerson’s campus?

Trisha Harris, a first-year fashion student feels strongly about the negative place camel toe should occupy in the annals of fashion history.

“I think it’s not right, it’s not attractive and it looks very uncomfortable. There is a line you just don’t cross, like hip-huggers worn down to the public line are a little too much.”

Joseph Cuffaro, another first-year fashion student also agrees.

“This is really disgusting, but it depends on how far apart the vagina is spread because the camel toe creates the flaps and is very unattractive. Some larger girls can have camel toe that starts from their bum all the way up to the front. It’s really gross.”

Cuffaro suggests the main reasons behind the frontal wedgies are the clingy, velour and terry cloth concoctions found in yoga attire and sweat outfits that emphasize all the nooks and crannies normally kept in check.

“That fabric doesn’t work with the body. It’s like the clothes wear you rather than you wearing the clothes,” he says.

On the other hand, perhaps a more practical, progressive approach is offered by Glenn Kauth, a first-year journalism grad student. He suggests the male camel toe can provide a convenient commercial for the self marketing man.

“I like to see the goods, so if a hot guy is walking down the street then it’s an easy way of checking out the package,” he says.

Whether grossly inappropriate or painfully misunderstood, it’s clear the camel toe craze is not yet fit for visual consumption here at Ryerson. However, if we dare to believe the future that’s been crafted for us on Star Trek, we may all be walking the decks someday like the liberated Deanna Troi — with nary a worry about our protruding camel toes.

On the other hand, we might just learn a lesson from those atrocious one-piece suits and tight lipped trends. And in this case at least, one hump is better than two.

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