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By Erin Valois

Sports Editor

The first week of university will always look like an episode of The Real World. If you’re new to this kind of lifestyle, you may need some help staying safe. Here’s how to impress everyone in residence with your knowledge of toxic substances.

Spinning out of control

No one likes when the spins set in, especially when you start to see four of that cute boy from the seventh floor. First, avoid staring at moving objects. This means that you shouldn’t look at your roommate who is dancing like a maniac or your ceiling fan. Don’t close your eyes. This is where the spins get their hold on you. Stare at a non-moving object. Close your eyes, and then open them. Do this at least three times.

To prevent yourself from faceplanting at your first residence party, try to be slow with your alcohol intake. If you feel the spins coming on, try to take a walk or sit in a quiet area. Eating before you drink can also fight off the dizzy feeling.

Purple Haze or Cocoa Puffs?

Be aware. Make sure if you’re partying with your friends you know what they’re doing.

It may seem silly but there is a big difference between taking a few tokes of weed and doing a half dozen rails of cocaine. Feel free to educate yourself about the world of drugs, it may help you and your friends in the long run.

Don’t be a nosey Nancy, but in a worst case scenario knowing what kind of drugs your friends are on can mean the difference between life and death. Seek help from an adviser if you think one of your friends has a serious addiction.

Be the mom. A cool mom

If you are at a party and you notice one of your friends is not responsive, check to see if they are unconscious. If they are not responding, breathing slowly and have clammy skin, call 911 immediately. Do not leave the person alone and seek help from the R.A. on your floor.

Don’t end up in the hospital

Drink responsibly to avoid alcohol-fuelled horror stories like getting your stomach pumped or having liver problems. There’s nothing wrong with cutting loose once in a while, but don’t make it a daily ritual. Treat your body like a temple — not a TTC bathroom. Make sure you eat before drinking heavily, and drink plenty of water during and after the drinking occurs. Remember, you can’t have fun if you’re unconscious and upside down in a stairwell.

Yakking up a storm

No one wants to admit the puker of the night is a party-ruiner. But it’s true. Your new friends don’t want to know what you had for lunch, and they definitely don’t want to smell it. It’s time to curb your drug and alcohol use and find out the warning signs of blowing chunks. You’ll probably be sweaty from all the shrooms given to you by the B.C. kid on the floor. The feeling of swelling under the tongue, excessive saliva and gagging are also other signifiers that the spew countdown has started.

To avoid embarassment and future cleanup, head to the bathroom for privacy. If occupied, get to a window. The rooms in the ILLC don’t have windows that can be opened, so try the garbage can in the lounge. Make sure you have good aim or else this will just get sloppy. And don’t get up right away after your first battle with the toilet. There’s more to come.

Find out more

If you have questions or concerns, look for the Campus Alcohol Responsibility Educators team. CARE walk around the campus in blue jackets with security and provide information about safe alcohol consumption.

Above all, they say to stay hydrated during a night of partying.

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