By Siobhan Mogensen and Nicole Schmidt
Whether it be a disgustingly early morning commute or a drunken transit adventure, at all hours of the day the TTC seems to serve as a breeding ground for unusual conversations. Eavesdropping often yields laughable results. Here’s the best of what we’ve overheard.
- “Please enter through the front doors. Just remember, Big Brother’s watching.” —Dundas streetcar driver
- “Apparently I kiss my teeth in my sleep.” —Drunk gangster boy on the Queen streetcar
- “I gave up racism in 1997.” —Drunk gangster boy’s friend on the Queen streetcar
- “We’re going left because I’m left handed. And because Beyoncé says so.” — Drunk girls exiting the streetcar
- “Fucking drivers. It’s like they get their licenses out of a cereal box.” — Electrician on the bus
- “You stayed up all night crying and snorting coke? I’m trying to work all day and start a family.” — Some guy on the phone on the subway
- “I’d rather do drugs than have sex. I’m never getting married again.” — Middle aged man on the Queen streetcar
- “She told Josh you stuff your bra. I looked at her and said, ‘you have no right to tell him that.'” — Teenage girl on the Queen streetcar
- “I was like, ‘you smell disgusting.’ And she was like, ‘I took a shower this morning.’ And I was like, ‘well, it didn’t work. No one likes you and your ratty ass hair and your ratty ass face.’ I was on a roll.” — Teenage girl’s friend on the Queen streetcar
- “You better not touch that fucking pay phone. It’s reserved for people who want to talk to God!” — Some man at the Queen and Church stop
- “Where are you going? I ain’t goin’ up those stairs!” — A woman shouting at her friend at Kennedy Station. Submitted by Robert.
Overheard something unusual on your daily commute? Send your quotes to email@example.com