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A letter to Toronto Mayor Fred Beavis

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By Robert Mackenzie

Originally published in our Sept. 6, 1978 issue. Fred Beavis became the interim mayor of Toronto for three months after a voting tie was decided by drawing names from a box.

Dear Mayor Beavis,

Congrats on your big win!

Now that you’re the interim mayor we have a couple of problems here at Ryerson Polytechnic that you need to fix.

• First of all, we need more space for student housing. Here at Ryerson you have a better shot of finding the Hillside Strangler than a dorm room!

• Secondly, can we get a snow day once in a while? The friggen Great Blizzard of 1978 comes rolling through and we still have to make our way to school!

• Travolta is really on a hot run right now. It’d be far out if we could get him to come to this new TIFF thing!

• The release of Piranha and Jaws 2 has gotten me thinking about water safety. What are you going to do to keep our beaches safe?

• I’m still on my 1978 FIFA World Cup high. What if we had a Polytechnic Cup between the soccer teams of all polytechnic institutes? I could dig that.

• Also, how about we get an indoor stadium for the Blue Jays? Going to a home game at this time of year reminds me of the friggen Great Blizzard of 1978!

• Make sure to give my warm regards to newlyweds King Hussein of Jordan and Queen Noor.

That’s all I have for now. Good luck in your time as mayor, I hope it lasts longer than John Paul I’s Papacy!

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