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Munchies when you have the munchies

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We’ve heard that everything tastes a lot better after you’ve added some green to your diet. If you’re high, that means you’ve already spent money to get yourself there. So what’s the harm in spending a few more bucks to calm your munchies? Diversity and cost is key, especially as a student. Luckily, our own holy Ryerson campus is right in the thick of everything you’ll need. We’ve listed five locations around you that are bound to satisfy your cravings in this sticky, icky situation.

Patties Express

If you’re going to get high, sweets are a damn dangerous road. You’ll get on it anyways, but before you do…get yourself a main meal. Well sorta. Trade in a toonie for a Jamaican patty at Elm and Yonge streets. With beef, chicken and vegetarian options, there’s something for everybody.

Pro Tip: They’re usually pretty hot, so crack it open with a small bite, let it cool a little and enjoy your walk ahead.

Krispy Kreme

As mentioned, the road for sweets, especially heart melting glazed sweets, is straight ahead. Literally. Just over a kilometre away, at the intersection of Elm and McCaul streets, is one of seven Krispy Kremes in all of Canada. The fact that there aren’t more of these beautiful doughnut locations is ridiculous—but we might as well fucking take advantage of what we have, even if it requires a bit of a walk.

Slushie

Whether you had a coffee or not, by this point you need that extra kick. The 2000s were a questionable time, but slushies deserve to make a comeback as the coolest, baddest drink. They’ll wake you up behind their sweet and fruity flavours, knowing you can mix ‘em right up and experiment as well. The fact that they’re like slightly melted freezies makes them perfect, but beware of the brain freeze that might cripple your entire body the next time you reach the local 7-Eleven.

Crunchy Cheetos 

The worst feeling is buying a bag of chips and it’s 70 per cent empty. You might expect it at this point, but you shouldn’t lower yourself to such shitty standards. Cheetos has it figured out, especially their “Crunchy” line, which resembles a bunch of really tiny joints. Of course there are other options, and it really depends on your favourite chips, but these Cheetos seem to always be available in the easy and convenient 90 gram size bag anywhere you go.

McDonald’s ice cream cone

So simple, but so underrated. All memes aside, a McDonald’s ice cream cone is a reliable option to make you feel like a whole lot better at any point of your buzz. You’ll feel like a kid at times, but that’s the price to pay for one of the least expensive items on the menu. If you’re worried about ice cream dripping all over your hands, stab it into a cup, and get yourself a spoon. And you’ll feel less bait.

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