Clueless Canadian university students have no idea who to vote for

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By Yousef Al Khodari

Many Canadian university students are voting for write-in candidates for the 2021 federal election. Some remain clueless about the varied issues at stake this year, whereas others blame the world being on the “brink of mass extinction” as the reason for their disinterest. 

According to a recent poll by Breez Magazine, the most common write-in candidates are Beyoncé and Ozzy Osbourne. Though the former’s popularity can be explained by her title as queen of the music industry, the latter’s popularity may only be explained by the fact he’s married to long-time X Factor judge Sharon Osbourne.

Other students are basing their choices on more personal issues. Lily Nell, a first-year engineering student at the University of Toronto, was initially unaware of the upcoming election until she was interviewed for this article. 

“Wait, there are elections? I thought we just elected Joe Biden,” she said.

However, Nell now plans to vote for Rihanna, another icon of the music industry, because “Rihanna helped my mind escape from disturbia,” she said. 

“Wait, there are elections? I thought we just elected Joe Biden”

This election has given youth a tough choice as polls project a tight race. Vote Crib, a youth organization that encourages students to vote, held a conference on Monday to highlight the importance of young Canadians voting in this election, however disinterested they may be.

“Every election we tell you to vote. Well, this time, we have only one thing to say: good luck,” said Andrew Sakes, president of Vote Crib. “Because even we have no idea what’s going on.”

At the end of the conference, Sakes officially endorsed Drake as a write-in candidate because “he’s done more for the nation than most prime ministers.”

The students who attended the conference say that they fully support this idea of having a hip-hop mogul leading the country.

“He put Canada on the map, like all of Canada…on a map,” said Gary Doozie, a member of Vote Crib. 

“I trust John Wick with my life and this country”

Not every student is totally in-the-dark about federal election candidates. Jill Kampells, an avid TikTok user who spends four hours per day scrolling through countless TikToks of Jason Derulo, said he finds Jagmeet Singh to be his top choice.

“I mean, come on now, have you seen the guy’s Snapchat filters? He’s so in touch with the world,” said Kampells.

Mark Limburg, a third-year English student at Ryerson, said he would have voted for Megan Thee Stallion but ultimately opted for Nicki Minaj, in hopes that Minaj will finally follow him on Twitter.

Other students raised certain questions about what the current parties stand for. Second-year engineering student Kate Jempworth asked why the Green Party chose the colour green.

“I hate that colour for real, like they could have chosen something cute like yellow or something,’ said Jempworth, a self-proclaimed expert on colour palettes.

The youth vote is usually the vote that either rocks the polls or keeps them mellow. But for Jempworth, there’s only one person who can save Canada’s future as prime minister: Keanu Reeves. 

“I trust John Wick with my life and this country,” she said. 

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