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Down With Dara: oral sex, because a closed mouth won’t get fed

In Communities /

By Bahoz Dara

Why am I coming across a growing number of people who are undermining how amazing oral sex is? The term “just oral” has been flooding my eardrums as of late and I’m reaching my breaking point!

Oral isn’t the leftover Pitman Hall sushi you settle for when there’s nothing else available, it’s the delectable main course, and trust me you will want to eat.

The mouth is wondrous and it can provide such immense pleasure. Oral sex acts such as fellatio, cunnilingus, and anilingus are incredibly enjoyable and underrated, and not to mention can be practiced safely!

Let us begin this mouth-exploration with dick-sucking, I mean throating-cock, I mean oral sex performed on the penis, sorry.

From my experience, fellatio seems to be the most well known form of oral sex amongst society. In theory it is relatively simple to execute, however there is no sense in just placing your mouth on a penis and calling it a day.

The most helpful tips I can provide to anyone looking to improve their blowjob skills would be to ask your partner what they like, try new motions, suctions, along with added simultaneous hand-mouth stimulation, and you should probably cover your teeth with your lips unless your partner specifies otherwise.

Although the act of oral sex performed on the male genitals does come off as fairly straight forward, there is one minor problematic component that I have seen many people struggle with – the gag reflex. For those who aren’t fully familiar with the concept, those who carry out oral sex have the option to guide the penis down their throat, for some this is an easy task and for those with a sensitive gag reflex the struggle is real.

The question on the mind of many is how do I desensitize my gag reflex? Well, although I have no reputable studies on hand to provide strong evidence, I do believe one could condition it and slowly work up to dulling the reflex intensity.

Two ways one can decrease their gag reflex is by performing oral sex and gradually allowing the penis to go further in the back of the mouth and to the throat, or simulating a similar action when brushing your teeth; move the toothbrush further back than you normally would.

Push yourself to the point you feel comfortable, and in all honesty if you don’t want to deep-throat a cock then by all means don’t, but for those gag-sensitive beings that do, there is hope!

One can also protect themselves against STI risk by having whomever is receiving wear a condom, and that’s pretty neat.

Now for the complete opposite of the penis, the vagina also needs mouth play. Most vaginas do need a good amount of care in order to prepare accordingly for penetration, thus oral sex is the perfect addition to intercourse.

Performing oral sex on the vagina and its surrounding areas (both the inner and outer labia, and the clitoris) can be highly arousing; said arousal can also lead to orgasm pre-penetration, or can catalyze the time it takes for the female to reach climax during a penetrative sex act.

Like all sexual acts this too has to be played by ear. With that said a very helpful general rule is to not pound on the clitoris like it is a rusty nail being forced into a 2×4 of solid oak.

Vaginas vary in sensitivity, thus one should always ask, and listen to your partner’s cues; there really isn’t a guidebook that applies to every female’s bits.  The intensity and pleasure of this act can also increase by simultaneous hand-tongue play.

Much like eating out, eating ass also requires a lot of tongue; test out licking different areas, for certain parts can be more sensitive than others depending on the person. Also, tongue penetration may or may not be preferred, and you must pay attention to your partner’s needs and wants.  It can be incredibly enjoyable for both parties, and has the potential to be a new and exciting addition in the bedroom or kitchen or the SLC (probably).

For those of you who are intrigued by ass play,  I also wrote an entire article on the matter a few weeks prior, check it here.

Both cunnilingus and anilingus can be acted out safely with the use of a dental dam. This item is basically a sheet of latex (or non-latex if you prefer) material that would go over the portions of either the anus, or the vagina and its surrounding area. They can be purchased at any sex shop, or one can be made at home by cutting of the tip of a condom and then vertically slicing it in half. Safety doesn’t stop at the male genitals, everyone can be protected!

So friends, be gracious, use those lips and stop undermining oral sex’s integrity!

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