Category: Fun & Satire

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This bitch needs your money. PHOTO: Jake Scott

GoFundMe, bitch

A Ryerson student is raising money to help keep her swear jar full.

Fucks given: zero. Aboslutely zero. PHOTO: Skyler Ash

How to have zero shame

Do you ever feel ashamed of yourself? Well, you should. You’ve got plenty of reasons to, but just forget about those. At least for now.

Mackenzie takes “insurmountable” lead in run for fun

Candidate Robert Mackenzie has taken an overwhelming lead in the race to be The Eyeopener's next fun editor.

My childhood travel diary

When I was five years old, my parents took my four older siblings and me to the Dominican Republic and asked me to keep a diary of our time.

Saturday morning cartoons

Our contributors offer up your weekly dose of cartoons!

Mackenzie gains key endorsements on campaign trail

Candidate Robert Mackenzie has gained some key endorsements ahead of the upcoming Eyeopener Fun editor elections.

The rebirth of Robert Mackenzie

The infamous former editor announces his run for fun.

No serious damage done to either party after nerd fight

Reports state an altercation between two high school dweebs resulted in zero injuries on either side.

Voices of Toronto

We ask Torontonians what they thought about Xzibit's controversial response to a Twitter user who asked him to pimp her ride.

You make me want to Scream

Pop culture has seeped into my consciousness,. It’s in me like white bloods cells and stretchy intestines.

Anti-hats rally crashed by pro-hats protesters

A rally took a turn for the worst when a group of protesters turned up Tuesday on Gould Street.

Horoscopes

Check out your weekly horoscope, brought to you by fun editor Skyler Ash!

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